


The One With Paige

by nerdfightingwhovian



Series: Slim Stiles 'Verse [1]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: ALL THE ANGST, Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - No Hale Fire, Alternate Universe - No Werewolves, Angst, Canonical Character Death, Child Death, Derek Feels, Derek Feels Guilty, Derek Hale Feels, Derek and Paige are besties, Derek blames himself for EVERYTHING, Gen, Guilt, HERE HAVE SOME TEARS AND FEELS INSTEAD, I was tired of giving people cavities, I wrote this because it was requested, Illnesses, LITERALLY, Major Illness, Minor Character Death, Paige Feels, Pre-Slash, Pre-Stiles, Sad, Sickfic, Sickness, Terminal Illnesses, Why Derek is a dick, Young Derek, Young Paige, and now I'm sad, even though he shouldn't, it's a problem, sick Paige
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-02
Updated: 2014-03-02
Packaged: 2018-01-14 06:10:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,367
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1255765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nerdfightingwhovian/pseuds/nerdfightingwhovian
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Derek used to be such a quiet young boy, then one day in the first grade, he made a friend, Paige. She brought him out of his shell, helped him make other friends and for years they two peas in a pod. Then, Paige got sick.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The One With Paige

**Author's Note:**

> Derek's angsty backstory was requested, thus you have it.  
> I realized that this chapter would be MASSIVE with Jennifer's part in Derek's story so, they will be separated. Also, this isn't the happy fluff that I normally write, so BEWARE, PROCEED WITH CAUTION. Pre-Stiles Derek is not a happy person, nice things don't happen to Pre-Stiles Derek. 
> 
> Trigger warnings for fatal illness and adolescent/child death. 
> 
> Remember, kudos and comments are how I know you caaarrreeeeee and without further adieu, the fic I promised you like, months ago. (Also, it's still unbeta'd so, yeah)
> 
> *throws fic at you before you realize how actually heartbreaking it is*

Derek had never been an incredibly exuberant child. He chose to show his happiness with grunts of approval instead of the wide, toothy smiles of his elder sister, Laura. As an infant, his parents would joke, he did not cry when he was angry or displeased instead he chose to glare until the situation was rectified. As a toddler, he sat with his plastic firetrucks and Transformers figurines silently. He moved the toys together, making them interact and play through some scene, but he never spoke, never made sound effects that would clue his parents into what Optimus Prime was doing or what Larry the Firetruck was going to do next. In fact, Derek went through all of preschool and kindergarten like that, playing silently at recess while children ran, screamed, and laughed together. Then in the first grade, Derek did something that startled his parents; he brought home a friend.

 

“Mom and Dad.” Derek turned to his friend, a girl with long brown hair and brown eyes. She had a small mole just under her left eye. “This is Paige.”

She stepped forward, “Hi Mr. and Mrs. Hale. I’m Paige, it’s very nice to meet you.” She was quiet like Derek, but smiles flitted across her face and when she laughed her nose crinkled.

That day, when Derek sat down to play with Larry the Firetruck and Optimus Prime, he was neither alone nor silent. The two ran around the living room, making flying noises for Optimus Prime, and evil laughs for Megatron. Every day saw Paige over at the Hale’s house, sometimes she would bring her Barbies and dolls so Larry the Firetruck and Derek had someone to save. Other times, Paige’s mother would come along with her and would make Paige practice the cello while Derek sat in fascination. At the end of her practice, Derek would clap and his smile would stretch across his face, and his sides of his eyes would crinkle to match Paige’s crinkled nose.

 

As they grew older, they began to do homework together. Derek would help Paige with the English and Paige would help Derek with the science and math. They would take cello breaks if it was too hot or too cold outside but if the weather was perfect, they would go outside and run around the backyard and play basketball or hide-and-seek.

For six years Paige and Derek were inseparable. For six years they spent their school days and lunches side by side in the cafeteria sharing jokes and book recommendations. For six years Derek watched Paige get better at the cello and Paige brought Derek out of his shell. He was more likely to smile than frown, and his laughter charmed family members and friends alike. Derek brought more friends home, and spent more time at friends’ houses. He did not spend time alone at recess, and chattered about his day at school. Then at thirteen, while Derek and Paige were in the seventh grade, Paige got sick.

That first day Paige was sick, her parents said it was only a cold or a flu that she would be back in a few days; her parents said not to worry. Her parents were wrong. That day, Derek still went to school and pretended as if everything was okay. He went from class to class silently and alone. When his algebra teacher called on him to answer a question, he said that x equaled three in the hopes that the answer would be correct, it wasn’t. At lunch Derek sat silently with the friends he and Paige had made together. When he returned from school his parents saw the return of his frowns and scowls.

On the second day, Paige’s symptoms had gotten worse. Her fever had gotten worse and her parents were thinking of taking her to the hospital. Derek had finally been able to convince his parents that he should be allowed to visit Paige at her house after school. That day at school he had something to look forward to and was actually able to answer questions correctly. He socialized at school and got “Get Well Soon” cards from everyone in their friend group. That afternoon laden with cards and books, Derek went over to Paige’s house. He made his way up the stairs and to her bedside. When Derek opened her door, a shaft of light fell across her bed and she winced and brought her hands up to try to block out the light. With a murmured sorry, Derek closed the door behind him.

 

“Hey, Paige.”

Paige’s eyes fluttered open and her mouth stretched into a shaky smile. “Derek.”

Derek pulled up her desk chair so that he was positioned right by her head. He brought his hand up to her hair and started pushing her sweaty bangs away from her forehead. “How’re you feeling, Paige-y?”

Her eyes fluttered closed, “My head hurts so much.”

“Will it help you feel better if I read to you?”

There went that weak smile again, “That would be great Der.”Derek positioned himself so he could read her favorite picture book from when they were younger. “Could you pick it up a little bit, I can’t lift my head to see the pictures.”

Derek immediately tipped the book and began reading aloud. By the end, Paige had fallen asleep. Derek smiled at his best friend and gave her one final stroke on her head. He made his way out the door and down the stairs. He was hidden in the stairwell when he overheard his parents arguing with Paige’s parents.

“Talia, we don’t need to take her to the hospital.”

“Barbara, it could be something serious.”

“Like what? There hasn’t been an outbreak of anything recently and her vaccinations are up to date. It’s just a stronger case of the flu or something. It’s nothing to lose our heads over.”

“Barbara, you never know. Things like this can escalate.”

“Talia, I appreciate your concern, but I really think you should mind your own business. My daughter is fine. My family is fine. We don’t need you to come in and try to fix everything.”

“Barbara, you and John are dear friends and our children are so close. We just want to make sure that everything is all right with Paige. She’s been out of school and she’s probably scared and it’s not making her feel any better. We just want to help and make her feel better. That is what friends do.”

Derek stood on the stairs for just a little while longer, listening to the whispers of the two mothers; the fathers were having a similar conversation, but they were much further from Derek than the mothers, so he could not hear individual words. Once Barbara’s whispers had dissolved into quiet sobs and Talia had wrapped her arms around the Barbara’s shoulders, Derek left his hiding place.

Talia saw her son and looked up, “Did Paige go to sleep, honey?” Barbara stiffened and straightened her back, turning away from Derek to wipe her eyes.

"Yeah she did, Mom. I read her a book ’til she fell asleep.”

“Is she feeling any better?”

“Her head still hurts a lot and I had to tip the book so she could see the pictures.”

“Why didn’t she just move her head, Derek?”

“She didn’t say, but her head was really hurting her.” Derek looked, wide-eyed at his mother, “I didn’t do anything wrong, did I Mom?”

Talia rushed over and pulled Derek into a hug, “No, you did everything perfectly. We are all just very worried for Paige.”

“Why? It’s just a cold. She’s gonna be all right. I mean, Laura had a cold a couple of weeks ago and she got better again. Paige is gonna get better, right mom?”

Talia’s softened as she looked down at Derek, “Of course she’s going to get better, Derek.” She turned to Barbara and said, “We are going to go, but please, think about what I said. We will be back tomorrow to say hi to Paige.” Barbara just nodded her assent.

On the way back to the house, Derek rambled on about Paige and all the thing they were going to do together when she got better. “Maybe I’ll buy her cello music. That’ll cheer her up right? Can we stop at the music store tomorrow?”

Talia turned around in the passenger seat to look at her son, “Of course, honey. I’m sure she will be very pleased.”

That night at 1:00 AM, after Derek and his siblings had all gone to bed, Talia and Philip got the phone call that Paige had been taken to the hospital. Then again, at 6:00AM the phone call was less audible words, and more Barbara sobbing into the mouthpiece.

An hour later at 7:00AM, Derek came bounding down the stairs. “Hey, mom! What time does the music store open?” He ran into the kitchen to see his parents sitting at the table, waiting for him. They sat next to each other, hands clasped together in the middle of the table. They locked eyes with him.

“Derek, please sit down.” Talia nodded to the chair across from them.

Derek froze, looked at the chair. “What’s wrong.”

“It’s about Paige.”

All color and blood drained out of Derek’s face. “It was a cold.”

Talia shook her head slightly. Derek’s eyes dimmed and filled with tears. “People get better from colds. It was a cold.”

Talia stood up from her chair and crouched down beside her son. She put an arm around his shoulder while Philip knelt in front of his son. Then he spoke, “It wasn’t a cold, Derek.” Derek began to tremble within the safe circle of his parents’ arms. “She had a seizure last night around 12:30, and then early this morning, she—”

Derek wrenched himself away from his parents and ran out of the kitchen. Instead of running up the stairs and into his room like he would have done normally, he turned right and went out the front door, heading into the woods that surrounded the Hale property. Derek kept running until his legs gave out and his lungs could no longer suck air in from the outside. He stopped, where he did not know, and fisted his hands in his hair. While he had been sleeping, alone, happy, safe, healthy, in his own bed, his best friend, correction his only friend had simply vanished. Tears, drying and fresh, tumbled down his face, silent and unnoticed.

He stumbled until he found a fallen log, and fell onto it. He buried his face in his hands, fingers tearing at his black hair. He thought about long afternoons spent wandering through the woods with Paige, climbing up trees, finding rabbit holes and fox tracks, howling like wolves. Once they had found a cave, and Paige had brought her cello to see what it would sound like; then she had played and the echoes of the music had surrounded them, swirled around them, until fading slowly into the rocks.

Derek did not pull his head out of his hands when Laura plopped herself down next to him. Of course his 16 year old sister had found him first, she always had a knack for finding him. She always said something about too many game of hide-and-seek when they were younger; Derek always mumbled that she had probably sold her soul to the devil—more often than not that answer would get him a punch in the shoulder. Laura’s arm slowly found a way around Derek’s scrawny thirteen year old shoulders. She was not normally one for outward displays of affection, but this was a special circumstance. Derek let his head be manipulated slowly out of his hands and onto Laura’s shoulder. His forearms rested high on his thighs and his face was turned into Laura’s clothed shoulder.

“I should have been there.” He mumbled into her sweatshirt. Laura said nothing in response, she just let him talk. “I should have been there. To read to her, or make her feel better. I should have been there.” He paused and his voice cracked. “She was alone.” Laura shifted slightly and tightened her hold on Derek’s shoulders.

“She wasn’t alone, Derek. Her parents were with her, right until the end.”

“I still should have been there.” Tears the two of them would never mention fell onto Laura’s sweatshirt.

“Derek, there was no way of knowing that she had gotten that sick.”

“I heard mom tell Barbara to take Paige to the hospital. Why didn’t they take her to the hospital.”

“There is no way of knowing if that would have saved her.”

“But they could have tried.”

“Derek, they did try.”

“Well, they didn’t try hard enough.”

Derek pushed himself away from Laura’s comforting shoulder. She let him go. He stood up from the log, angry now. “They should have tried harder, worked faster, done more.”

Laura stood up from the log now too, “What are you going to do then, Derek? Blame everyone whose fault it was?” Derek stayed silent, arms crossed, scowling at his sister. “Blame her parents because they didn’t take her to the hospital. Blame our parents because they didn’t wake you up. Blame them because they didn’t force her parents to take her to the hospital sooner. Blame the doctors because they might have saved her with more time. Blame yourself because you couldn’t save her. Blame medicine because it didn’t work fast enough. Blame Paige because she got sick in the first place. Blame her because she wasn’t strong enough. Blame whoever got Paige sick because they gave it to her. What are you going to do, Derek? Blame the whole world? Go through your life angry, blaming everyone who could have saved someone else but didn’t because they didn’t know?”

Derek dropped his arms, and shoved his hands into his pockets. He lifted his pale, sad green eyes to meet Laura’s snapping ones. “I should have been there.” Laura’s shoulders slumped in defeat. “I should have saved her.” Then he turned, went back through the woods, and returned to the Hale house.

**Author's Note:**

> I feel like I should mention that Paige had Meningitis, which can come along with seizures, light sensitivity, and it is commonly mistake for a cold, except it is much more dangerous. Paige went septic meaning that the bacterial toxins got into her bloodstream and began shutting down her organs which is why her condition deteriorated so rapidly. Meningitis is incredibly dangerous, and if not caught and treated it can be fatal. I would like to be clear that I am NOT blaming anyone in this fic or trying to insinuate that anyone is at fault.
> 
> I'm sorry, I had to. On the plus side, next week I will be posting Jennifer's part of Derek's backstory (even more angst, but Jennifer is a bitch in that one, so at least an antagonist)  
> Also, after that will be Derek's POV of "Slim Stiles" so happier times for Derek are in the future.


End file.
